Arabella

from The Female Quixote by Claire Wittman

Genre: Comedy

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Arabella, a fanciful young lady, accepts a carriage ride home from her friend and admirer, but then begins to fear that he will be mistaken for an abductor.

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ARABELLA

Why, look! Here is the post chaise coming from town.

My father is great friends with the coachmen, who bring him gossip from court which makes my father ever gladder he has left such an excessive, luxuriant world. Though I think I would not mind it so much as he did. But have they seen me, do you think?

They might think it shocking that I am alone in a gig with a young gentleman, if they do not know the proper truth of the matter! They can hardly think I would go so quietly were I not forcibly compelled.

I must ensure he does not mistake us.

(Arabella stands up in the gig. She calls back to the post chaise.)

Do not be alarmed! Nay, you need not stay your progress on my account, good sir! I am not kidnapped, nor taken off on an ill-advised elopement! This gentleman is merely a friend of my father and someone whom I would not marry without the express permission of our respective families, and only then after extremely lengthy consideration and barring all other options!

(She sits again, satisfied.)

It is you who should be appreciative, Sir Charles, for I am preventing your imprisonment or certain death in defense of my honor. We may not always get along in perfect harmony, but I should hate to see you done to death in a duel.